I woke up this morning feeling rather nauseous, something that hasn't been around for a good while. (Important Note: once again, no, I'm not pregnant.)
Great way to start a blog post, hey? Sorry - and you'll be wondering what on earth this has to do with my mission. I'll endeavour to elucidate. A few posts back (in my snow post) I wrote about the speed at which physical improvements have been occurring - and how I'm coping with them, along with the periods of time when physical work isn't possible, because it seems it's either one or the other of these two extremes with little or no middle ground. This post is about the former - the speed at which things have been happening since I've been home for the holidays.
I appear to have been making some rather radical changes over these last four weeks. For the most part they're not likely to be noticed by people other than those who work most closely with me, although some will be, but that doesn't make them any less radical. The thing is, my whole approach to my physicality and the way I move is different. Whether a switch has flicked, neurons are firing in a new way, or something else has happened, I don't know. All I can say, like the true musical theatre geek I am, is 'something has changed within me'. I think it might be a continuation of my newfound ability to notice (finally!) and to celebrate my body as it is, and all the wonderful things it (and any relatively healthy body) is able to do - like breathe, pump blood through my veins, and be alive. But I'm not sure. Whatever it is, it's wonderful - and it's caused such a fundamental shift that my vestibular system is all over the place, as though I'm being repeatedly knocked off balance.
But I don't mind feeling sick as a result, because I'm learning to read my body's signs, so I'm viewing this nausea as just another reminder that I'm on the right track. If it happens again tomorrow I'll try my best to smile - it simply means I'm in motion.